(0253) second awakening
monstrosities in the wind turn over my fate until my heart turns gray. i weep for my long-lost emotion, battered into this strange and unfamiliar territory. i can't shake this off either. if i could only recognize myself when i looked at a mirror. i don't wanna hear this shit anymore. it just makes it worse. distance doesn't even deserve to exist. what a horrible noise. terminal patient who missed the deadline, and from now on, he listens to classical music when he writes. time signatures i'd love to replicate into something ugly and foreign. there's nothing i don't doubt anymore. nothing is true. nothing is lasting. just a standard card in the deck. nothing more. and i miss the innocence of opening and re-opening doors. built on the thinnest of ice, he comes to bleed with the rest. holding and folding, we bet on the uselessness of flesh. the governments will have no influence left should the canvas remain the same, and death will guarantee a safe transaction either way. winter coming to freeze this over, but these delusions contain all the antifreeze i could ever need. strain to see the light, and i'll throw my hands up and forfeit the fight. tomorrow could be tonight if you would just move your eyes towards the sky.
there is never enough. there is never a sign as clear. it's the disease of our hidden flesh that's got me so wrapped up in my fears. they were one in the same. they were always two steps behind. and now, the silence of this empty coffee cup has got me going out of my mind. blink, and i will be gone with the rest. there's nothing here to stop me. think that you're carrying the nest, but you're only the sugar that comes out in my pee. show me what is left over inside from the stomach ulcer that slowly damages. and i'll keep it away from those who lie to themselves - those who have a reflective sheet of glass hanging over their eyelids. the bacteria multiplies when you're not aware that the sun is always over the ocean. i'll stand in line for years and years and years if that's what it takes to put me in motion. they think i'm leaving, but i'm really getting in position to arrive. the wounds are only deepening, and we're just salvaging all that we can find. if no one knows where the truth in me resides, then that's a risk that i'm willing to take because everyone has something else to give, but me, i'd rather have something i can make. you think that the past is only just an indication of the future so i guess the television memories we had were just an indication of this complex computer. a second awakening was all i needed, and i can only hope i never fall asleep again.
walking through this wormhole no one could ever see even if they tried. i think i'll find another way to break through this door of imaginary ice. i start to wonder whenever i look out of this most hideous of windows. the pictures all pass by like days, and i just tumble down the stairs. i said, "a million dropped calls and hands waving goodbye were the best thing that could ever happen to me. i wouldn't miss you or the lie of a relationship we had, no matter what the memory." now, she is free to find what she needs to keep her feeling alive so she doesn't have to bleed. it's a mess of wires, and i have nothing to show you so you don't have to look. i stand forever in the back of my head until i'm ready to depart. then, i look down to my feet and wonder if they could actually ever move me like art. starting to throw in the towel because i never had a chance. i'd be lucky if i ever got the gift of being asked to dance. it's all statistical mechanics when you're looking at me and i'm looking back at you. i don't think there's anything that could be as pure or anything as blue. and now, i have left my emptiness in you. i don't say a word, and we don't think it through. and it'll always be there, even if the sun comes back to save you from my heart-shaped gun of despair. the innocent were always guilty in their minds with the medicine they hide from everyone else's eyes. and just like that, it was all swept away to the curb of your silence with nothing left to pay. i built up this castle and watched as it sank, then i opened my mouth and took one last drink to my grave.
and when it comes down to it, perception is all we have. chaos is in their eyes, and i look away so i don't have to see it. i fail to move in that direction, and the clock keeps circling like my head whenever it focuses too much. better be on the move because nothing changes here. a darkened red cloth in my back pocket. i guess i'll wipe that up too. and on our way, maybe we'll even take pictures. power outage in the basement goes unnoticed. follow the leader. we type it, and we listen to it because the deaf will never see what the blind couldn't hear. nonsensical maybe.. but the feeling is mutual. take a number. take a fucking number and sit down.
this is only a temporary solution, but we bleed the same.
the wrong radio frequencies jam up my broadcasts. he's over the limit probably anyway. once, i had a story to tell. girl trapped between the glass and ambitions we can't control. the other side of the fence is just one decision away. one flight from starvation. the electric thrashing in this static makes me want to merge with the blood flowing through your veins. and that, i'll take to my grave. go ahead and try to read through the lines. like he said, this ain't real. it's reality.
there is never enough. there is never a sign as clear. it's the disease of our hidden flesh that's got me so wrapped up in my fears. they were one in the same. they were always two steps behind. and now, the silence of this empty coffee cup has got me going out of my mind. blink, and i will be gone with the rest. there's nothing here to stop me. think that you're carrying the nest, but you're only the sugar that comes out in my pee. show me what is left over inside from the stomach ulcer that slowly damages. and i'll keep it away from those who lie to themselves - those who have a reflective sheet of glass hanging over their eyelids. the bacteria multiplies when you're not aware that the sun is always over the ocean. i'll stand in line for years and years and years if that's what it takes to put me in motion. they think i'm leaving, but i'm really getting in position to arrive. the wounds are only deepening, and we're just salvaging all that we can find. if no one knows where the truth in me resides, then that's a risk that i'm willing to take because everyone has something else to give, but me, i'd rather have something i can make. you think that the past is only just an indication of the future so i guess the television memories we had were just an indication of this complex computer. a second awakening was all i needed, and i can only hope i never fall asleep again.
walking through this wormhole no one could ever see even if they tried. i think i'll find another way to break through this door of imaginary ice. i start to wonder whenever i look out of this most hideous of windows. the pictures all pass by like days, and i just tumble down the stairs. i said, "a million dropped calls and hands waving goodbye were the best thing that could ever happen to me. i wouldn't miss you or the lie of a relationship we had, no matter what the memory." now, she is free to find what she needs to keep her feeling alive so she doesn't have to bleed. it's a mess of wires, and i have nothing to show you so you don't have to look. i stand forever in the back of my head until i'm ready to depart. then, i look down to my feet and wonder if they could actually ever move me like art. starting to throw in the towel because i never had a chance. i'd be lucky if i ever got the gift of being asked to dance. it's all statistical mechanics when you're looking at me and i'm looking back at you. i don't think there's anything that could be as pure or anything as blue. and now, i have left my emptiness in you. i don't say a word, and we don't think it through. and it'll always be there, even if the sun comes back to save you from my heart-shaped gun of despair. the innocent were always guilty in their minds with the medicine they hide from everyone else's eyes. and just like that, it was all swept away to the curb of your silence with nothing left to pay. i built up this castle and watched as it sank, then i opened my mouth and took one last drink to my grave.
and when it comes down to it, perception is all we have. chaos is in their eyes, and i look away so i don't have to see it. i fail to move in that direction, and the clock keeps circling like my head whenever it focuses too much. better be on the move because nothing changes here. a darkened red cloth in my back pocket. i guess i'll wipe that up too. and on our way, maybe we'll even take pictures. power outage in the basement goes unnoticed. follow the leader. we type it, and we listen to it because the deaf will never see what the blind couldn't hear. nonsensical maybe.. but the feeling is mutual. take a number. take a fucking number and sit down.
this is only a temporary solution, but we bleed the same.
the wrong radio frequencies jam up my broadcasts. he's over the limit probably anyway. once, i had a story to tell. girl trapped between the glass and ambitions we can't control. the other side of the fence is just one decision away. one flight from starvation. the electric thrashing in this static makes me want to merge with the blood flowing through your veins. and that, i'll take to my grave. go ahead and try to read through the lines. like he said, this ain't real. it's reality.
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